A guy dies and is sent to Hell. Satan
meets him, shows him doors to three
rooms, and says he must choose one spend
eternity in. In the first room,
people are standing in shit up to their
necks. The guy says "no, let me see the
next room." In the second room,
people are standing with shit up to
their noses. Guy says no again.
Finally, Satan opens the door to the
third room. People are standing with
shit up to their knees, drinking coffee
and eating danish pastries. The guy
says, "I pick this room." Satan says
okay and starts to leave, and the guy
wades in and starts pouring some coffee.
On the way out Satan yells, "O.K.,
coffee break's over. Everyone back on
your heads!" : : deschide bancul
Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery.
When I got there, the guy was locking
the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign
says you're open 24 hours." He goes:
"Not in a row!" : : deschide bancul
Three kids come down to the kitchen and
sit around the breakfast table. The
mother asks the oldest boy what he would
like to eat. - I would have some
****** French toast, he says. The
mother is outraged at his language and
sends him upstairs. She asks the
middle child what he wants. - Well,
I guess that leaves more ******* French
toast for me, he says. She is livid
and sends him away. Finally she asks the
youngest son what he wants for
breakfast. - I do not know, he says
meekly, but I definitely do not want the
******** French toast. : : deschide bancul
A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow
of silence: he is allowed to say two
words every seven years. After the
first seven years, the elders bring him
in and ask for his two words. "Cold
floors," he says. They nod and send him
away. Seven more years pass. They
bring him back in and ask for his two
words. He clears his throats and says,
"Bad food." They nod and send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring
him in for his two words. "I quit," he
says. "That is not surprising," the
elders say. "You have done nothing but
complain since you got here." : : deschide bancul
One day an employee sends a letter to
his boss asking for an increase in his
salary!!!
Dear Bo$$
In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing
mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be
under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$
who have given $o much $upport including
$weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean
and re$pond $oon.
Your$
$incerely, Norman John
The next day, the employee received
this letter of reply:
Dear
NOrman,
I kNOw you have been
working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing
much has changed. You must have NOticed
that our company is NOt doing NOticeably
well as yet. NOw the newspaper [...] citește tot