HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB? Put about 100 bricks in some particular order in a closed room with an open...
propus: 10 Mar 2006
HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE
JOB?
Put about 100 bricks in
some particular order in a closed room
with an open window. Then send 2 or 3
candidates in the room and close the
door. Leave them alone and come back
after 6 hours and then analyses the
situation.
If they are counting
the bricks. Put them in the accounts
department.
If they are
recounting them. Put them in auditing.
If they have messed up the
whole place with the bricks. Put them in
engineering.
If they are
arranging the bricks in some strange
order. Put them in planning.
If
they are throwing the bricks at each
other. Put them in operations.
If they are sleeping. Put them in
reception
If they have broken
the bricks into pieces. Put them in
information technology.
If they
are sitting idle. Put them in human
resources.
If they say they
have tried different combinations, yet
not a brick has been moved. Put them in
sales.
If they have already
left for the day. Put them in marketing.
If they are staring out of the
window. Put them on strategic planning.
And then last but not least.
If they are talking to each
other and not a single brick has been
moved.
Congratulate them and put
them in top management.
This is an actual job application that a
75 year old senior citizen submitted to
Walmart in Arkansas. They hired him
because he was so funny.
- - - - - -
- - - - -
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy
Bastard)
SEX: Not lately, but I am
looking for the right woman (or at least
one who will cooperate)
DESIRED
POSITION: Company's President or Vice
President. But seriously, whatever's
available. If I was in
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marți, 21 Noiembrie 2006
A baby polar bear comes up to his mother
and asks, "Momma, am I a polar bear?"
"Why, yes, son, of course you are a
polar bear," she replies, sending him
out to play.
Several minutes
later, he returns. "Momma, are you
absolutely sure I am a polar bear?"
"Yes, son, absolutely sure. Now go
and play."
Several minutes
later, he returns asking, "Momma, you're
sure I'm 100% polar bear?"
"Yes,
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 13 August 2008
The phone rang. It was a salesman from a
mortgage refinance company. "Do you have
a second mortgage on your home?"
"No," I replied.
"Would you like
to consolidate all your debts?"
"I
really don't have any," I said.
"How
about freeing up cash for home
improvements?" he tried.
"I don't
need any. I just recently had some done
and paid cash," I parried.
There was
a brief silence, and then he
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 2 Februarie 2007
My wife's family and I were at a Harding
University football game. Every time
someone carried the ball or made a
tackle, the announcer would broadcast
who had made the play.
Near the
beginning of the third quarter after the
announcer called a play, my niece,
Madison, looked up at my wife and
innocently asked, "Is that God talking?"
... deschide bancul Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 22 Noiembrie 2006
I am passing this on to you because it
definitely worked for me and we all
could use more calm in our lives. By
following the simple advice I heard on a
Dr. Phil show, I have finally found
inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed, "The
way to achieve inner peace is to finish
all the things you've started." So I
looked around my house to see all the
things I started and hadn't
finished, and before
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 30 Mai 2005
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and
suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot
of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks
than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink
very little red wine and suffer fewer
heart attacks than Americans.
4. The
Italians drink excessive amounts of red
wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than
Americans.
5. The Germans drink a
lot of beers and eat
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 11 Noiembrie 2004
A Chinese couple got married. When a
baby girl was born, her eyes were big
and blue, hair was curly and blonde,
skin was brown. Finally, the father
named the baby SUM TING RONG."
... deschide bancul Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 11 Septembrie 2006
TEACHER: George Washington not only
chopped down his father's cherry tree,
but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you
know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the
axe in his hand.
... deschide bancul Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 1 Mai 2009
All the scientists die and go to heaven.
They decide to play hide-n-seek.
Unfortunately Einstein is the one who
has the den. He is supposed to count up
to 100 and then start searching.
Everyone starts hiding except Newton.
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter
and stands in it right in front of
Einstein. Einstein's counting:
1,2,3..97,98,99,100.
He opens his
eyes and finds Newton standing in
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 5 Septembrie 2005
An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert,
moved to Texas.
Bert always wanted a
pair of authentic cowboy boots, so,
seeing some on sale, he bought them and
wore them home.
Walking proudly, he
sauntered into the kitchen and said to
his wife, "Notice anything different
about me?"
Margaret looked him
over.. "Nope."
Frustrated, Bert
stormed off into the bathroom, undressed
and walked back into the
... citește tot Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marți, 27 Ianuarie 2009