All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle. They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the...
Joke from category: Bancuri in Engleza (English)
proposed: 28 Nov 2006
Explicatii de dat atunci cand nu va merg aplicatiile si programele. COUNT DOWN...... 20. That's weird... 19. It's never done that before. 18. It worked yesterday. [...]
previous joke In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. The instructor asked, How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth, [...]
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Students at a school were asked to write about the harmful effects of oil on fish. One 11-year-old wrote, "When my mom opened a tin of sardines last night, it was full of oil and all the sardines were dead." ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Friday, 4 May 2007
A man follows a woman out of a movie theatre. She has a dog on a leash. He stops her and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I couldn't help but notice that your dog was really into the movie. He cried at the right spots, he moved nervously in his seat at the boring parts, but most of all, he laughed like crazy at the funny parts. Did you find that unusual?" "Yes," she replied, "I found ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Monday, 18 October 2004
Bula at the exam: Teacher: - Bula, I hope that this time I won't catch you cheating again! Bula: - I hope so too. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Thursday, 18 August 2011
- Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were awarded medals of honor for courage. ...?...? How many is a brazillion? ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Tuesday, 11 October 2005
I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me and we all could use more calm in our lives. By following the simple advice I heard on a Dr. Phil show, I have finally found inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've started." So I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Monday, 30 May 2005
A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself. A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears. A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book. A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party. A real friend comes ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Thursday, 5 May 2005
An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, crying, the mother says, "Who did this to you? I want to know!" The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Monday, 18 October 2004
The Programmer's drinking song: 99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, Fix one bug, compile it again, 101 little bugs in the code. 101 little bugs in the code, 101 bugs in the code, Fix one bug, compile it again, 103 little bugs in the code. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Monday, 16 October 2006
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner. Dispatcher: Do you have an address? Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why? ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Thursday, 12 April 2007
The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Thursday, 31 March 2005
I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. "Why?" my daughter asked. "Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's been, it'sdirty and probably has germs" I replied. At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Thursday, 22 March 2007
When Charles de Gaulle decided to retire
from public life, the British ambassador
and his wife threw a gala dinner party
in his honor. At the dinner table, the
Ambassador’s wife was talking with
Madame deGaulle:
- Your husband has been such a prominent
public figure, such a presence on the
French and international scene for so
many years! How quiet retirement will
seem in comparison. What ... read all Bancuri in Engleza (English) Friday, 6 March 2009
European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Wednesday, 5 April 2006
- What is the longest word in the English language? - It is the word "smiles", because there is a mile between the first letter and the last! ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Sunday, 20 October 2013
On some air bases, the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied, "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American ... read all
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Tuesday, 10 July 2007