La o sectie de politie este adusa o
femeie care a trecut pe rosu. Politistul
de servici incepe interogatoriul: -
Numele ? - Camelia D. - Varsta ?
- 28 de ani . - Ocupatia ? -
Invatatoare . Politistul se ridica
de la masa, zambeste fericit si ii
spune: - Minunat! Am asteptat
aceasta ocazie o viata intreaga. Acum va
asezati pe scaunul acesta si scrieti de
5000 de ori , cu o caligrafie perfecta:
"Daca semaforul este rosu, trecerea este
interzisa!" : : deschide bancul
Politia rutiera la locul accidentului
discutand despre importanta purtarii
centurii de siguranta: - Uitati-va
la acest om care nu a purtat centura:
cap rupt, matze pe parbriz, ochi in
pomi, fara maini.... , in schimb,
uitati-va la cel care a purtat
centura... parca-i viu. : : deschide bancul
Jack and Max are walking from religious
service. Jack wonders whether it would
be all right to smoke while praying. Max
replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?"
So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks,
"Priest, may I smoke while I pray?"
But the Priest says, "No, my son,
you may not. That's utter disrespect to
our religion." Jack goes back to
his friend and tells him what the good
Priest told him. Max says, "I'm not
surprised. You asked the wrong question.
Let me try." And so Max goes up to the
Priest and asks, "Priest, may I pray
while I smoke?" To which the Priest
eagerly replies, "By all means, my son.
By all means."
Moral : The
reply you get depends on the [...] read all
Un naturalist amator studiaza un purice.
Il aseaza pe o foaie de hartie si striga
: - Sari ! Puricele sare.
Naturalistul ii taie picioarele, il pune
iar pe hartie si striga: - Sari !
Puricele nu mai sare ! Naturalistul
noteaza: "Dupa ce i se taie
picioarele, puricele nu mai aude" : : deschide bancul
Category: Bancuri Diverse On site from date of: 1 September 2004 Score 8.8 of 19 votes
Printr-o fereastra deschisa, se aude un
glas de barbat: - In casa asta eu
comand!!! Apoi un glas de femeie:
- Ia iesi de sub pat si mai spune o
data !!! : : deschide bancul
A young husband comes home one night,
and his wife throws her arms around his
neck: "Darling, I have great news: I'm a
month overdue. I think we're going to
have a baby! The doctor gave me a test
today, but until we find out for sure,
we can't tell anybody."
The
next day, a guy from the electric
company rings the door-bell, because the
young couple hasn't paid their last
bill:
"Are you Mrs. Smith?
You're a month overdue, you know!"
"How do YOU know?" stammers the
young woman.
"Well, ma'am, it's
in our files!" says the man from the
electric company.
The student reports
for his university final examination
that consists of yes/no type questions.
He takes his seat in the examination
hall, stares at the question paper for
five minutes and then, in a fit of
inspiration, takes out a coin and starts
tossing it, marking the answer sheet:
Yes, for Heads, and! No, for Tails.
Within half an hour he is all done,
whereas the rest of the class is still
sweating it out.
During the
last few minutes he is seen desperately
throwing the coin, muttering and
sweating. The moderator, alarmed,
approaches him and asks what is going
on. "I finished the exam in half an
hour, but now I'm rechecking my
answers." : : deschide bancul
This is classic - a true story,
proving how fascinating is the mind of a
six year old. They think so logically.
A teacher was reading the story
of the Three Little Pigs to her class.
She came to the part of the story where
the first pig was trying to gather the
building materials for his home. She
read, "...and so the pig went up to the
man with the wheelbarrow full of straw
and said, 'Pardon me sir, but may I have
some of that straw to build my house?"
The teacher paused then asked the
class: " And what do you think the
man said?" One little boy raised his
hand and said very matter of factly "I
think the man would have said: "WHAT [...] read all