Un doctor cheama deoparte pe sotia
pacientului. - Nu stiu cum sa va
spun, dar nu-mi place cum arata sotul
d-voastra. - Nici mie doctore, dar e
un tata atat de bun pentru copilul
nostru... : : deschide bancul
Manning the computer help desk for the
local school district was my first job.
And though I was just an intern, I took
the job very seriously. But not every
caller took me seriously. - Can I
talk to a real person? a caller asked.
- I am real, I said. - Oh, I'm
sorry, the caller said. That was rude of
me. What I meant to say was, could I
talk to someone who actually knows
something? : : deschide bancul
Two mothers are having a conversation
about their children one day. - How
do you get your Marvin up so early on
school mornings? asks Joan. - Oh,
that's easy, replies Marianne. I just
throw the cat on his bed. - Why does
that wake him up? - He sleeps with
the dog! : : deschide bancul
Gheorghe merge cu gloaba la targ. -
Cum trage calul asta la caruta, bade?
- D'apoi, nu prea trage. - Da'
la plug, trage? - Nu prea. - O
fi bun de calareala. - N-as crede.
- Pai, atunci de ce l-ai adus sa-l
vinzi? - Nu l-am adus sa-l vand.
- Da' ce pacatele mele vrei sa faci
cu el? - Vreau sa-l fac de
rusine... : : deschide bancul
Category: Bancuri cu Gheorghe On site from date of: 10 March 2008 Score 8.1 of 10 votes
After school one day, a young
first-grade boy was sitting at the
kitchen table, eating his afternoon
snack, when he blurted out, "Mom, the
teacher was asking me today if I have
any brothers or sisters who will be
coming to school." The boy's mother
replied, "That's nice of her to take
such an interest, dear. What did she say
when you told her you are an only
child?" She just said, "Thank
goodness!" : : deschide bancul
Mesterul Manole cocotat pe schele, spoia
tavanul manastirii. Ramane fara var in
galeata. De lene sa se dea jos de pe
schele, urla la unul dintre cei noua
mesteri mari, calfe si zidari: -
Macheeee! Var! Mache, rezemat de
zidul manastirii, fumand, cu sticla de
bere langa el, raspunde, in glas cu o
lene colosala: - Mache love, not
var... : : deschide bancul
Animalele se plimba cu avionul. Rata ii
cere ursului, lipsita de orice maniere:
- Da-mi imediat o tigara! Ursul
ii da. Dupa 5 secunde, iar: - Da-mi
imediat un foc! Ursu ii da. Din
spate, vulpea prinde si ea curaj, ii
cere si ea ursului: - Da-mi imediat
o tigara! Ursu se enerveaza, ia rata
si vulpea si le arunca pe geam din
avion. La care rata catre vulpe:
- Vulpe stii sa zbori? - Nu!
- Si atunci de ce faci pe desteapta
in avion? : : deschide bancul
Vine unu la doctor si spune: - Dom'
doctor am o problema. - Spune, ca
de-aia sunt aici. - Sunt un om de
afaceri de succes, merg prin toata tara,
dar cand ajung acasa o vad pe nevasta
mea in compania celui mai bun prieten.
- Bine domne? dar eu sunt doctor...
- Lasa-ma sa termin. Scot pistolu
sa-l impusc dar ea spune: "Stai calm, nu
te enerva, ca daca-l omori faci
puscarie? Mai bine stam la o cafea si
discutam problema". - Da domn'e, dar
eu sunt doctor... - Lasa-ma sa
termin. In urmatoarea saptamana la fel.
Dupa doua saptamani la fel, dom doctor.
Ajung acasa, o vad pe sotia mea in
compania celui mai bun prieten, iar eu
furios, scot pistolu insa ea spune
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