On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student: - What are your parents' names? The student replied: - My father's...
propus: 19 Mar 2015
Q: Tarzan and the animals went to the
river to take a bath. Tarzan removed his
clothes. All the animals laughed. Tarzan
A: The animals told
him. Your tail is in front". ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 5 Februarie 2007
- Cash, check or
charge? I asked, after folding items the
woman wished to purchase.
fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a
remote control for a television set in
- So, do you always carry
your TV remote? I asked.
- No, she
replied, but my husband refused to come
shopping with me, and I figured this was
the most evil thing I could do to him
legally. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 7 Mai 2010
A man follows a woman out of a movie
theatre. She has a dog on a leash. He
stops her and says, "I'm sorry to
bother you, but I couldn't help but
notice that your dog was really into the
movie. He cried at the right spots, he
moved nervously in his seat at the
boring parts, but most of all, he
laughed like crazy at the funny parts.
Did you find that unusual?"
she replied, "I found ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 18 Octombrie 2004
Barbara Walters of 20/20 did a story on
gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan
several years before the Afghan
conflict. She noted that women
customarily walked about 5 paces
behind their husbands. She returned to
Kabul recently and observed that women
still walk behind their husbands, but
now seem to walk even further back and
are happy with the old custom.
Walters approached one of ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Septembrie 2004
An architect, an artist and an engineer
were discussing whether it was better to
spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time
with his wife, building a solid
foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said he enjoyed time with
his mistress, because the passion and
mystery he found there.
said: "I like both. If you have a wife
and a mistress, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 31 Martie 2005
A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were
waiting one morning for a particularly
slow group of golfers. The engineer
- What's with these guys?
We must have been waiting for 15
The doctor chimed in:
I don't know, but I've never
seen such ineptitude!
- Hey, here comes the greens
keeper. Let's have a word with
him.... Hi George! Say, what's ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 31 Martie 2005
I was out walking with my 4 year old
daughter. She picked up something off
the ground and started to put it in her
mouth. I took the item away from her and
I asked her not to do that. "Why?" my
daughter asked. "Because it's been on
the ground, you don't know where it's
been, it'sdirty and probably has germs"
I replied. At this point, my daughter
looked at me with total admiration and ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 22 Martie 2007
Year 1981 =========
Charles got married
crowned Champions of Europe
Year 2005 =========
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned
Champions of Europe (again)
*** In Future,
Charles wants to re-marry
Liverpool needs another crown. .... POOR
POPE....!! ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 23 August 2005
An old mafia Don is dying and he calls
his grandson to the bed.
lissin-a me. I wanna for you to taka my
chrome plated 38 revolver so you will
always remember me.
- But grandpa,
I really don't like guns. Howzabout you
leava me your rolex watch instead?
Shuddup and lissin. Somma day you gonna
runna da business, you gonna have a
beautifulla wife, lotsa money, a biga
home and maybe a ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 17 Octombrie 2005
This is an actual job application that a
75 year old senior citizen submitted to
Walmart in Arkansas. They hired him
because he was so funny.
- - - - - -
- - - - -
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy
SEX: Not lately, but I am
looking for the right woman (or at least
one who will cooperate)
POSITION: Company's President or Vice
President. But seriously, whatever's
available. If I was in ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 21 Noiembrie 2006
In order to assure the highest level of
quality work and productivity from
employees it will be our policy to keep
all employees well trained through our
program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY
TRAINING (S.H.I.T) ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 19 Iulie 2007
A Czech goes to the optician who shows
him a card with the letters 'C Z W X
N Q S T A C Z'.
"Can you read
this?" the optician asks.
it?" the Czech replies, "I even know the
guy." ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 31 August 2004
News from Apple
announced today that is has developed a
computer chip that can store and play
music in women's breast implants.
The iBoob will cost between $499 and
This is considered to be
a major breakthrough, because women are
always complaining about men staring at
their breasts and not listening to them.
Thank to Apple, everyone is now
happy. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 28 Noiembrie 2007