Friends of women: A wife was not at home for a whole night. So she tells her husband, the very next morning, that she stayed...
propus: 28 Sep 2004
A soldier stationed in Iraq recently
received a "Dear John" letter from his
girlfriend back home. It read as
no longer continue our relationship. The
distance between us is just too great. I
must admit that I have cheated on you
twice, since you've been gone, and
it's not fair to either of us.
Please return the
picture of me that I sent to ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 10 Iunie 2005
1. The sport of choice for the urban
poor is BASKETBALL.
2. The sport of
choice for maintenance level employees
3. The sport of choice
for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.
4. The sport of choice for
supervisors is BASEBALL.
sport of choice for middle management is
6. The sport of choice for
corporate officers is GOLF.
you are in ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 18 Octombrie 2004
When the new patient was settled
comfortably on the couch, the
psychiatrist began his therapy session.
"I'm not aware of your problem," the
doctor said. "So perhaps, you should
start at the very beginning."
course," replied the patient. "In the
beginning, I created the heavens and the
earth..." ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 19 Iulie 2007
21st CENTURY LIFELESSNESS...
Our communication - Wireless
telephone - Cordless
Our cooking -
Our youth - Jobless
religion - Creedless
Our food -
Our faith - Godless
labor - Effortless
Our conduct -
Our relation - Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
feelings - Heartless
Our politics -
Our education - Valueless
Our Follies - ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 20 Iulie 2005
During a taxi, the crew of a US Air
departure flight to Ft. Lauderdale made
a wrong turn and came nose-to-nose with
a United 727. The irate ground
controller (a female) lashed out at the
US Air crew screaming, "US Air 2771,
where are you going? I told you to turn
right on 'Charlie' taxi way; you turned
right on 'Delta.' Stop right there. I
know it's difficult to tell the
difference between a C ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 25 Martie 2008
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical
formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L
M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking
DONALD: Yesterday you said
it's H to O. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 26 Noiembrie 2008
I've sure gotten old. I've had two
bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, and
new knees. Fought prostate cancer and
diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear
anything quieter than a jet engine, and
take 40 different medications that make
me dizzy, winded, and subject to
blackouts. Have bouts with dementia.
Have poor circulation; hardly feel my
hands and feet anymore. Can't remember
if I'm 85 or 92. Have ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 11 Decembrie 2006
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks
into a pharmacy and wanders up & down
The sales girl notices
him and asks him if she can help him. He
answers that he is looking for a box of
tampons for his wife. She directs him
down the correct aisle.
minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of
cotton balls and a ball of string on the
She says, confused, 'Sir, I
thought you were ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Duminica, 30 Mai 2010
A new store named Husband-Mart opened.
Husband-Mart is a store where women can
go and choose a husband from among many
men. The store is composed of six
floors, and the men increase in positive
attributes as the shopper ascends the
flight of stairs. There is, however, a
catch. AS you open the door to any floor
you may choose a man from that floor,
but if you go up a floor, you cannot go
back down ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 30 Noiembrie 2004
I can't send my
salary this month, so I am sending 100
kisses. You are my sweetheart.
His wife replied back after some
days to her husband:
Thanks for your 100
kisses, I am sending the expenses
1. The Milk man agreed on 2
kisses for one month's milk.
The electricity man only agreed after 7
3. ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 13 Septembrie 2005
Hung Chow calls work and says:
Hey, boss I no come work today, I really
sick. I got headache, stomach ache and
my legs hurt, I no come work.
- You know Hung Chow, I
really need you today. When I feel like
that I go to my wife and tell her to
sing for me. That makes everything
better and I go work. You try that.
Two hours later Hung Chow calls
- Boss, I do what you say ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 16 Martie 2005
People who do lots of work... make lots
People who do less
work... make less mistakes.
who do no work... make no mistakes.
People who make no mistakes... gets
That's why I spend
most of my time sending e-mails &
playing games at work... I need a
promotion. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 10 Ianuarie 2005
I am not sure exactly how this works,
but this is amazingly accurate.
picture below has two identical dolphins
in it. It was used in a case study on
stress levels at the Mayo Clinic and
later at Fletcher Medical Center in
Look at both dolphins
jumping out of the water. The dolphins
are identical. A closely monitored,
scientific study revealed that, in spite
of the fact that ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 25 Martie 2008
The truth about working in the IT
1. We work weird
2. They pay you to
make the client happy...
client pays a lot of money, but your
employer keeps almost every penny...
4. You are rewarded for fulfilling
the client's dreams...
friends fall apart and you end up
hanging out with people in the same
profession as you...
6. When you
have to meet the ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 27 Noiembrie 2006