TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America. MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered...
propus de: Claudia pe data: 26 Nov 2008
A Sunday school teacher was telling her
class the story of the Good Samaritan,
in which a man was beaten, robbed, and
left for dead. She described the
situation in vivid detail so her
students would catch the drama. Then she
asked the class, "If you saw a person
lying on the roadside, all wounded and
bleeding, what would you do?"
thoughtful little girl broke the hushed
silence, "I think I'd ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 2 Mai 2007
My sister, a truck driver, had decided
to get a dog for protection. As she
inspected a likely candidate, the
trainer told her, "He doesn't like men."
Perfect, my sister thought, and took the
Then one day, two men in a
parking lot approached her, and she
watched to see how her canine bodyguard
would react. Soon it became clear that
the trainer wasn't kidding. As the men
got closer, the dog ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 13 Iunie 2007
Unexpected cold snaps had destroyed the
buds on my father's young peach tree for
two years in a row. This spring, Dad was
ready. He replanted the sapling in a
large box, mounted it on wheels, and put
the tree in the garage whenever the
One warm April
day, Dad was wheeling the tree out into
the yard, and he stopped to give our dog
a drink from the garden hose. A neighbor ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 14 Iunie 2007
An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert,
moved to Texas.
Bert always wanted a
pair of authentic cowboy boots, so,
seeing some on sale, he bought them and
wore them home.
Walking proudly, he
sauntered into the kitchen and said to
his wife, "Notice anything different
Margaret looked him
stormed off into the bathroom, undressed
and walked back into the ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 27 Ianuarie 2009
A blonde at the grocery store:
would like 4 tomatoes, 4 potatoes and 4
- I can help you with the
tomatoes and the potatoes, but not with
- Ok... than I'll
have 2 tomatoes, 2 potatoes and 2
- I see you don't understand
me: I have tomatoes, I have potatoes,
but I have no onions.
- I see...
then I'll have a tomato, a potato and an
- Ok, let's do this ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Sambata, 14 Iulie 2007
Thoughts from USA...
When NASA first started
sending up astronauts, they quickly
discovered that ball-point pens would
not work in zero gravity. To combat this
problem, NASA scientists spent a decade
and $12 billion developing a pen that
writes in zero gravity, upside-down, on
almost any surface including glass and
at temperatures ranging from below
freezing to over 300 ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 10 Martie 2006
I was having trouble with my computer.
So I called Harold, the computer guy, to
come over. Harold clicked a couple of
buttons and solved the problem. He gave
me a bill for a minimum service call.
As he was walking away, I called
after him, "So, what was wrong?"
replied, "It was an 'ID ten T' error."
I didn't want to appear stupid, but
I nonetheless inquired, "An ID ten T
Error? What's that, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 4 Iunie 2007
You are driving along in your car on a
wild, stormy night. You pass by a bus
stop, and you see three people waiting
for the bus:
1. An old lady who
looks as if she is about to die.
An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect man (or) woman you
have been dreaming about.
would you choose to offer a ride to,
knowing that there could only be one
passenger in your car. ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 16 Mai 2005
Hung Chow calls work and says:
Hey, boss I no come work today, I really
sick. I got headache, stomach ache and
my legs hurt, I no come work.
- You know Hung Chow, I
really need you today. When I feel like
that I go to my wife and tell her to
sing for me. That makes everything
better and I go work. You try that.
Two hours later Hung Chow calls
- Boss, I do what you say ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 16 Martie 2005
Subject: Geography lesson for the Day
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
Between 18 and 20 a woman is
like Africa, half discovered, half wild,
naturally beautiful with fertile deltas.
Between 21 and 30 a woman is
like America, well-developed and open to
trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35 she is like
India, very hot, relaxed and
convinced of her own beauty.
Between ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 10 Noiembrie 2004
Two lawyers arrive at the pub and
ordered a couple of drinks. They then
take sandwiches from their briefcases
and began to eat.
Seeing this, the
angry publican approaches them and says,
'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own
sandwiches in here!'
The two look at
each other, shrug and exchange
sandwiches. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Iunie 2011