A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the...
propus: 3 Iun 2008
Friends of women:
A wife was
not at home for a whole night. So she
tells her husband, the very next
morning, that she stayed at her
girlfriend's apartment over night.
So the husband calls 10 of her best
girlfriends and none of them confirm
Friends of men:
A husband was not at home for a
whole night. So he tells his wife the
very next morning, that he stayed at his
friend's ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 28 Septembrie 2004
A man is taking a walk in Central park
in New York. Suddenly he sees the little
girl being attacked by a pitbull. He
runs over and starts fighting with the
dog. He succeds in killing the dog and
saving the girls live.
who was watching the scene walks over
- You are a hero, tomorrow
you can read it in all the newspapers:
"Brave New Yorker saves a little girl's
- But ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 3 Mai 2006
One night while I was cat-sitting my
daughter's indoor feline, it escaped
outside. When it failed to return the
following morning, I found the beast
clinging to a branch about 30 feet up in
a spindly tree. Unable to lure it down,
I called the fire department.
don't do that anymore," the woman
dispatcher said. When I persisted, she
was polite but firm. "The cat will come
down when it gets ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 30 Ianuarie 2007
I went to the cinema the other day and
in the front row was an old man and with
him was his dog. It was a sad funny kind
of film, you know the type. In the sad
part, the dog cried his eyes out, and in
the funny part, the dog laughed its head
off. This happened all the way through
the film. After the film had ended, I
decided to go and speak to the man:
- That's the most amazing thing I've
seen, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 14 Noiembrie 2011
After school one day, a young
first-grade boy was sitting at the
kitchen table, eating his afternoon
snack, when he blurted out, "Mom, the
teacher was asking me today if I have
any brothers or sisters who will be
coming to school."
The boy's mother
replied, "That's nice of her to take
such an interest, dear. What did she say
when you told her you are an only
She just said, "Thank ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 10 Martie 2008
There were these three nuns that were
killed in a traffic accident, and
immediately sent to the Pearly Gates.
As St. Peter was looking over their
files, he said, "You ladies have been
very good, but before I can let you in,
you have to answer a question." So he
asks the first nun,
- "What was the
name of the first man that God created?"
- "Adam," she replied. The lights
started flashing, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 5 Iunie 2006
A pickpocket was appearing in court for
a series of petty crimes. "Mr.
Brewster," the judge said, "you are
hereby found guilty and fined the sum of
After consulting with his
client, Mr. Brewster's lawyer stood up
and said, "Your Honor, my client is a
little short at this time. He has only
$125 in his pocket, but if you would
allow him a few minutes in the crowd..." ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 5 Martie 2007
A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets
pulled over by a Cop. Being a typical
lawyer, he thinks he is smarter than the
Cop so he decides to have some fun at
the Cop's expense.
License and registration, please.
- What for?
- You didn't come to a
complete stop at the stop sign.
- I slowed down,
and no one was coming.
- Exactly! License ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 22 Noiembrie 2005
There is this good old barber in one
city in the US.
- One day a florist
goes to him for a haircut. After the
cut, he goes to pay the barber and the
barber replies: "I am sorry. I cannot
accept money from you. I am doing
community service." The Florist is happy
and leaves the shop. The next morning
when the barber goes to open his shop,
there is a thank you card and a dozen
roses waiting at his ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 9 Februarie 2006
A husband and his wife had a bitter
quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
The husband yells,
"When you die, I'm getting you a
headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My
Wife - Cold As Ever'."
she replies, "When you die, I'm
getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At
Last.'" ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 9 Iunie 2005
An architect, an artist and an engineer
were discussing whether it was better to
spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time
with his wife, building a solid
foundation for an enduring relationship.
The artist said he enjoyed time with
his mistress, because the passion and
mystery he found there.
said: "I like both. If you have a wife
and a mistress, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 31 Martie 2005
A lady about eight months pregnant got
on a bus. She noticed the man opposite
her was smiling at her. So she
immediately moved to another seat.
This time the smile turned to a
grin, so she moved again. The man seemed
even more amused. When, on the fourth
move, the man burst out laughing, she
complained to the driver and he had the
The case came up in
court. The judge asked the man ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 2 Iulie 2007
Subject: Geography lesson for the Day
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
Between 18 and 20 a woman is
like Africa, half discovered, half wild,
naturally beautiful with fertile deltas.
Between 21 and 30 a woman is
like America, well-developed and open to
trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35 she is like
India, very hot, relaxed and
convinced of her own beauty.
Between ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 10 Noiembrie 2004