The Programmer's drinking song: 99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, Fix one bug, compile it again, 101...

Banc din categoria: Bancuri in Engleza (English)

propus: 16 Oct 2006

The Programmer's drinking song:

99 little bugs in the code,
99 bugs in the code,
Fix one bug, compile it again,
101 little bugs in the code.
101 little bugs in the code,
101 bugs in the code,
Fix one bug, compile it again,
103 little bugs in the code.

The best short story on Religion, Sexuality and Mystery.
banc precedent
Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man in a three-piece suit. This young lawyer agreed to marry my daughter, said one. No! He agreed to marry [...]
banc urmator

Friends of women:

A wife was not at home for a whole night. So she tells her husband, the very next morning, that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment over night. So the husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends and none of them confirm that.

Friends of men:

A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the very next morning, that he stayed at his friend's ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 28 Septembrie 2004


Bill and Diane were in a terrible accident and Diane's face was severely burned.

The doctor told Bill that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny.

So Bill offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 31 August 2004


A hamster and a rat were sitting on the side of a swimming pool. They were enjoying the sun. Suddenly the rat turned to the hamster and asked him:
Dude,

How come people consider me a noisance, and you a pet?
How come people pay money to have you, while they are trying to kill me?
How come you are considered a cute little animal, while I am considered creepy and disgusting?
How come you ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Septembrie 2004


Who's your best friend? Just try this experiment... Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of the car for an hour. When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you? ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 12 Martie 2008


I'm sorry that you haven't gotten much email from me lately. It's because I'm tired. For a couple years I've been blaming it on iron poor blood, lack of vitamins, dieting and a dozen other maladies. But now I found out the real reason. I'm tired because I'm overworked.
The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 18 Octombrie 2004


Positive Thinking Poem...

Little birdy in the sky,
You look up and it shits in your eye
You don't mind and you don't cry,
You just thank God that cows don't fly... ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 10 Martie 2006


A dog walks into an employment agency and says:
- I'd like to get a job please.
The guy at the employment agency says:
- Wow, you could easily get a job at the circus, with your talents!
The dog replys:
- What would the circus want with a plumber? ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 19 Noiembrie 2013


First-year students at Texas A&M's Vet School were receiving theirfirst anatomy class, with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them:
- In vet medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor: the first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 2 Mai 2007


My wife's family and I were at a Harding University football game. Every time someone carried the ball or made a tackle, the announcer would broadcast who had made the play.
Near the beginning of the third quarter after the announcer called a play, my niece, Madison, looked up at my wife and innocently asked, "Is that God talking?" ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 22 Noiembrie 2006


- Bless me Father, for I have sinned with a woman.
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Johnny Parisi?"
- Yes, Father, it is.
- And who was the woman you were with?
- I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation.
- Well, Johnny, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?
- I cannot say.
- Was it Teresa Volpe?
- ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 6 Octombrie 2006


1. Project Manager is a person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.
2. Developer is a person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a baby.
3. Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks a single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4. Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
5. Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 11 Aprilie 2005


Barbara Walters of 20/20 did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked about 5 paces behind their husbands. She returned to Kabul recently and observed that women still walk behind their husbands, but now seem to walk even further back and are happy with the old custom.
Ms. Walters approached one of ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Septembrie 2004


Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: This is her husband! ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 12 Aprilie 2007


You Know You Have a Bad Computer When...
10. The lower corner of screen has the words "Etch A Sketch" on it.
9. When you insert a disk, it spits out a pack of cigarettes.
8. You have to pedal it.
7. The manual contains one sentence: "Good luck!"
6. The only chip inside came from a bag of Doritos.
5. When you turn it on, the dogs in the neighborhood start howling.
4. You catch a virus from ... citeste tot

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 20 August 2007


If Adam and Eve were Chinese we would still be in paradise because they would have ignored the apple and eaten the snake. ... deschide bancul

Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 24 Februarie 2005