Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, It was a...
Banc din categoria: Bancuri in Engleza (English)
propus: 31 Mar 2005
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
banc precedent Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
banc urmator
- Comenteaza
- 8.0 din 2 note
To do is to be. Socrate
To be is to do. Aristotel
Do be do be do. Sinatra ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 19 Decembrie 2005
Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs Italian, the mechanics German, the lovers French and it is all organized by the Swiss.
Hell is where police are German, the chefs British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss and it is all organized by the Italians. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 29 Noiembrie 2005
Two lawyers arrive at the pub and ordered a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat.
Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them and says, 'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own sandwiches in here!'
The two look at each other, shrug and exchange sandwiches. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Iunie 2011
In order to assure the highest level of
quality work and productivity from
employees it will be our policy to keep
all employees well trained through our
program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY
TRAINING (S.H.I.T) ... deschide bancul Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 19 Iulie 2007
A man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 6 Octombrie 2006
Answering Machine at the Mental Hospital:
Hello, and welcome to the mental health hospital.
-If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
-If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
-If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5 and 6.
-If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
-If you ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 18 Octombrie 2004
At a U2 concert in Ireland, Bono (the lead singer) asks the audience for some quiet. Then he starts to slowly clap his hands. Holding the audience in total silence, he says into the microphone...
"I want you to think about something. Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."
A voice from the front of the audience yells out...
"Then ****** stop clapping, ya ********!" ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 19 Iunie 2007
Bono is at a U2 concert in Dublin when he asks the audience for some quiet.
Then, in the silence, he starts to slowly clap his hands.
He says into the microphone, in a deep solemn voice...
"Just for a moment, think outside yourself... Outside this arena... Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."
A loud Irish voice from near the front pierces the moment...
"Well, ya ****** ****, ... citeste tot
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 27 Octombrie 2006
A man is dying of Cancer. His son asked him, "Dad, why do you keep telling people you're dying of AIDS?"
Answer: "So when I'm dead no one will dare touch your mom!" ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 5 Octombrie 2006
A linguistics professor was lecturing his class one day.
- In English, he said, a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Romanian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.
A loud voice from the back of the room piped up:
- Yeah, right. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 8 Iunie 2011
My grandmother is a computer geek. She also has trouble remembering quickly sometimes. One day she couldn't think of what she wanted to tell us.
Mom explained, "Your grandma is trying to retrieve the information, but it is taking awhile. Evidently she hasn't defragmented her hard drive lately." ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Luni, 8 Octombrie 2007
Year 1981 =========
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe
3. Pope Died.
Year 2005 =========
1. Prince Charles got married (again)
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe (again)
3. Pope Died.
*** In Future,
if Charles wants to re-marry
or Liverpool needs another crown. .... POOR POPE....!! ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Marti, 23 August 2005
This coming week is National Mental Health Care week.
You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.
Well, my job is done! ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Joi, 18 Ianuarie 2007
In an attempt to stop the spread of bird flu, President George W. Bush has just bombed the Canary Islands."
Turkey is next... ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Vineri, 2 Iunie 2006
Concerned about fitness in my middle 40s, I enrolled in an aerobics class. To my dismay I walked into a room filled with much younger women and decided to combat my nervousness with humor.
"I'm here to do my postnatal exercises."
The instructor gave me an appraising look. "How old is your baby?"
"Twenty-six," I replied. ... deschide bancul
Bancuri in Engleza (English) Miercuri, 13 Februarie 2008