A statistician, who refused to fly after
reading of the alarmingly high
probability that there will be a bomb on
any given plane, realized that the
probability of there being two bombs on
any given flight is very low. Now,
whenever he flies, he carries a bomb
with him. : : deschide bancul
Two women came before wise King Solomon,
dragging between them a young man in a
three-piece suit. "This young lawyer
agreed to marry my daughter," said one.
"No! He agreed to marry MY
daughter," said the other. And so
they haggled before the king until he
called for silence. "Bring me my
biggest sword," said Solomon, "and I
shall hew the young attorney in half.
Each of you shall receive a half."
"Sounds good to me," said the first
lady. But the other woman said, "Oh,
sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let
the other woman's daughter marry him."
The wise king did not hesitate a
moment. "The attorney must marry the
first lady's daughter," he proclaimed.
"But she [...] citeste tot
A Sunday school teacher was telling her
class the story of the Good Samaritan,
in which a man was beaten, robbed, and
left for dead. She described the
situation in vivid detail so her
students would catch the drama. Then she
asked the class, "If you saw a person
lying on the roadside, all wounded and
bleeding, what would you do?"
thoughtful little girl broke the hushed
silence, "I think I'd throw up." : : deschide bancul
One spelling mistake can destroy your
life! A husband wrote a message to
his wife on his business trip and forgot
to add 'e' at the end of a word...
"I am having such a wonderful time!
I wish you were her..." : : deschide bancul
WORDS A husband read an article to
his wife about how many words women use
a day: 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The
wife replied, 'The reason has to be
because we have to repeat everything to
men... The husband then turned to
his wife and asked, 'What?' : : deschide bancul
Well, it appears our African-American
friends have found yet something else to
be pissed about. A black congresswoman
reportedly complained that the names of
hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding
names. She would prefer some names that
reflect African-American culture such as
Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaqueal,
and Jamal. She would also like the
weather reports to be broadcast in
language that street people can
understand. I can hear it now: A
weatherman in Houston says...
"Wazzup, Mutha-fukkas! Hehr-i-cane
Chamiqua be headin' fo' yo ass like
Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a
category fo'! So grab yo' chirren, yo'
Ho, leave yo crib, and head fo' de
nearest guv'ment office [...] citeste tot