Two lawyers arrive at the pub and
ordered a couple of drinks. They then
take sandwiches from their briefcases
and began to eat. Seeing this, the
angry publican approaches them and says,
'Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own
sandwiches in here!' The two look at
each other, shrug and exchange
sandwiches. : : deschide bancul
Robert went to his lawyer and said:
- I would like to make a will, but I
don't know exactly how to go about it.
The lawyer smiled at Robert and
replied: - Not a problem, leave it
all to me. Robert looked somewhat
upset and said: - Well, I knew you
were going to take a big portion, but I
would like to leave a little to my
family too! : : deschide bancul
A linguistics professor was lecturing
his class one day. - In English, he
said, a double negative forms a
positive. In some languages, though,
such as Romanian, a double negative is
still a negative. However, there is no
language wherein a double positive can
form a negative. A loud voice from
the back of the room piped up: -
Yeah, right. : : deschide bancul
If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story
building at the same time, who would
reach the ground first? The woman,
the man would get lost. : : deschide bancul
The man told his doctor that he wasn't
able to do all the things around the
house that he used to do. When the
examination was complete, he said: -
Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in
plain English what is wrong with me.
- Well, in plain English, the doctor
replied, you're just lazy. - Okay,
said the man. Now give me the medical
term so I can tell my wife. : : deschide bancul
One spelling mistake can destroy your
life! A husband wrote a message to
his wife on his business trip and forgot
to add 'e' at the end of a word...
"I am having such a wonderful time!
I wish you were her..." : : deschide bancul
Dear God: My prayer for Next Year is for
a fat bank account & a thin body.
Please don't mix these up like you
did last year. Thank you so much!
Happy New Year! : : deschide bancul
WORDS A husband read an article to
his wife about how many words women use
a day: 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The
wife replied, 'The reason has to be
because we have to repeat everything to
men... The husband then turned to
his wife and asked, 'What?' : : deschide bancul
WIFE VS. HUSBAND A couple drove down
a country road for several miles, not
saying a word. An earlier discussion
had led to an argument and neither of
them wanted to concede their position..
As they passed a barnyard of mules,
goats, and pigs, the husband asked
sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.' : : deschide bancul